Thoughts
by XDKScullyX
Summary: Just read and let me know what you think. This is my first fanfic, it was written around season 6. Hope you like it.Please send reviews or opinions work too.
1. Default Chapter

Scully is away from the office for the day. She is at Quantico doing autopsies

for the closing of a case so that they may get their report filed with A. D.

Skinner in time, leaving Mulder to work by himself for the day. Ever wonder what

Mulder thinks about on a daily basis? It just may surprise you…

Monday  
6:30 P.M.

Mulder's office

Getting up from his desk and closing his briefcase for the day, Mulder switches

off the light and heads out of the office for the evening. Closing the door and

locking it behind him, he heads for the elevator. He goes out to his car and

drives home.

He walks into the apartment building and gets on the elevator, the

ride on the elevator goes by surprisingly quickly. He reaches into his trench

coat pocket, digging around for his keys, he pulls them out, along with a couple

of sunflower seeds, which he looks at and drops on the ground. He then opens his

apartment door. He walks in, switching on the light and shutting the door behind

him, he sets down his briefcase on the floor next to the doorway. He walks over

to the desk and switches on the lamp. He reaches over on the shelf and picks up

the fish food, as he carefully drops some food into the fish, he notices the

answering machine light blinking, so he reaches over and pushes the message

button on the machine. Hearing Scully's voice on the machine, a smile crosses

his face.

"Mulder, I have one more autopsy to do then I will fax you the reports

on these bodies, but as for now, it looks like these people all died of natural

causes, so call me tomorrow and Mulder…get some rest."

Reaching over to stop the machine and placing the lid back on the fish food, he then

places the fish food back on the shelf beside the tank. He reaches over switching off the

lamp on the desk, and walks to the sofa. He sits down, grabs the remote and starts

flipping through the channels, realizing there is nothing on, he flips it off then lies

back to relax for the evening and think about the events of the day.

A few vague memories of Samantha cross his mind, along with some flashbacks of them

playing Stratego, then he suddenly turns his mind away from that subject and he starts

thinking about other things, the memories of Samantha's abduction are too

painful.

Thoughts of other things enter his mind…work, what he had for lunch,

mmm, lunch, that thought reminds him that he has not eaten since lunchtime. He

gets up and grabs his keys, he walks out the door and goes to the elevator.

He exit's the elevator and then exit's the lobby. He goes around the corner to the

sub shop for a sandwich, chips and an iced tea. He sits at a corner table to eat

as slender, leggy, brunette crosses in front of him. She has shoulder length

brown hair and is wearing a black dress suit, from the back, she reminds him of

Diana. He finishes his sandwich and goes back to his apartment.

Entering the lobby and back on the elevator, the ride is much slower this time. He finally

exits the elevator and walks to his door. He pulls out his keys and opens the

door, shutting the door behind him and walking to the sofa. He lies back on the

sofa and his thoughts race with the memories of the past and present. Thoughts of his

family, his friends, his enemies, his dad…Samantha…Diana…Scully…ah…Scully.

She is such an incredible woman, and such a wonderful doctor, but an even better

friend. She is such a great person, intellectual, strong, beautiful. Wow, what a lucky man

he is, to be able to have such a great friend to work with on a daily basis,

though she doesn't believe in anything…she is still willing to risk her life

every day for a cause that isn't even her own and doesn't really concern her.

She is always there anytime, no matter how "spooky" things sometimes get.

It must be difficult for her to work with someone that closely, every day of your life that

you care that much about though you do not really care about the cause of your real

work.

Scully wonders why I sleep on the sofa, but she doesn't understand, how

could she…my relationship with Diana has never been spoken of until recently,

maybe someday I will tell her of my past. The long nights with Phoebe spent in

London, the longs days and nights spent with Diana working on the X Files, the

marriage Diana and I had once had. More importantly, what we could have had, had

it not been for me falling deeper and deeper into the tangled web that the

Syndicate was weaving for me. This not only causing the demise to our

relationship but also my personal demise as well.

Getting up to walk to the bedroom to put on a pair of boxers and a t shirt, he

glances at the dresser, with a big sigh, he sits down hard on the corner of the

bed. The same bed that they went over cases in, the same bed that they used to

sleep in, the same bed that they made love in on so many nights.

God, how he missed her, and he knew that deep down inside, he sill loved her and

would always lover her, for she was part of him, she was his friend, his partner, his

lover, his wife. Nevertheless, he could never ask her to come back to him after

the things he put her through before. That is how much he loved her, that no

matter how lonely he was he could never bring her back to him, though he knew

that she would come back at anytime, if given the chance.

Reaching into the top drawer of the dresser beside the bed, the pulls out his old wedding

ring and starts looking at it. His mind started to race with the horrible memories of that

rainy night when she left him, breaking his heart and tearing life, as he knew it apart.

6:00 P.M.

The Mulder Residence

1990

Mulder was sitting home on the sofa drinking a beer and smoking a cigarette,

when Diana arrives home from work, drenched from head to toe, due to the

rainstorm going on outside. Mulder usually found this very much of a turn on, he

loved the thought of seeing her running from the car in her heels, with the rain

pouring down upon her. Usually, making a comment or two about how sexy he thinks

it is for women to be wet, though if her were wearing the heels and hose, he

would undoubtedly, think differently.

Tonight, he just looked at her as if she were an idiot for not taking an umbrella with her

today.

"Got a little wet did ya, you should have taken your umbrella, didn't you watch the

weather," he asks her, rolling his eyes and turning his attention back to the smoke rolling

up from the ashes he just flipped into the tray on the table.

"Fox, how long have you been sitting here, "she asks him in a quiet tone, knowing that

he is in one of his moods and she doesn't want to stir him up tonight.

Answering her in a hateful tone, "since this morning, why the hell does it matter to you?"

Looking at him pitifully, "Fox, you really should make this vacation a productive one, do

something around the house, visit some old friend, or go see your parents," she replies

disapprovingly.

Almost yelling at her he reply, "don't tell me how to spend my vacation, if I want to sit

here on my ass all week, I will," he yells, turning his attention once again to he television

that is on in the background though nobody is really watching it.

"Fine, you do that, you just sit here and drink yourself into a stupor all because poor Fox

Mulder has to take two weeks off work."

Walking into the bedroom, she slips off her wet shoes, and she then continues with the

rest of her clothing, peeling them from her one piece at a time. She then picks up the pile

of wet clothes and carries them into the adjoining bathroom, tossing them into the tub,

she grabs the towel on the rack next to the door on her way out. She towel dries her hair

a bit, to stop it from dripping onto her shoulders, she then reaches into the closet and

grabs her navy blue robe and wraps it around her. She tosses the towel against the door,

walks over to the bed, props a few pillows up comfortably against the headboard, and

sits down.

She starts reading a book that is lying on the nightstand beside the bed, when she hears

the front door slam. "Fox? Fox? Dammit!" Putting the book down on the bed, she walks

into the living room, his cigarette is still burning in the ashtray, the half-empty beer still

sitting on the table.

She puts out the cigarette, and picks up the beer, taking it into the kitchen, she dumps

the beer into the sink. Switching off the television on the way back in to the bedroom,

she picks up the telephone and calls his cell number. "The cellular customer you are

trying to reach is unavailable…Dammit Fox!"

7 ½ Hours Later

1:30 A.M.

The Mulder Residence

Mulder arrives home drunk, but no more than when he left the house. He is a

little wet, but most of the rain has stopped now, it is just a light mist so it

is just enough to wet his hair and face a little.

He walks through the living room, through the bedroom, and continues into the

bathroom, passing Diana as if she were not even in the room.

Looking at him with a look of relief, "Fox, where have you been? I was very worried, I

tried to call you on your cell but I couldn't get you."

He walks fully into the bathroom and slams the door, tuning her out as if she were not

even speaking.

"Fox" no answer, "Fox!" still no answer, she walks to the bathroom door and opens it

to see him doing his nightly hit of cocaine. "Dammit Fox, I told you that you have to stop

this, either you get help or I will get it for you." He reaches over, slams the door in her

face, and goes on about his business.

She walks to the bed, picking up the telephone, she starts dialing a number as he walks

out of the bathroom. He glances at her, noticing the phone in her hand, "who are you

calling at this hour?" he asks curiously, though, no longer in a bad mood as earlier

tonight, which she is very thankful for.

Looking at him with a concerned look on her face, "I am calling someone to get you the

help you need."

A look of anger crosses his face as he slaps the phone from her hands. "I don't need

your help, all I need is for you to stop being such a bitch, and who the hell do you think

you are telling me what to do? As a matter of fact, I think you just need to stay the hell

away from me and everything will be fine."

Hurt and upset, "fine, I will do just that," she says, grabbing her suitcase from under the

bed and opening it. She starts packing a few items from the top drawer in the dresser.

"Where the hell do you think you are going?" He asks her.

Crying now, "away from you Fox, as far away as possible," she replies while continuing

to pack.

Mulder is in a rage now, "Oh no, you aren't going anywhere," grabbing he suitcase and

throwing it across the room. She watches as clothes go flying across the bed and the

suitcase drops to the floor with a thud.

Walking over to him, she reaches up and slaps him across the face, then the realization

of what she has just done, hits her. He paces toward her with a look of madness in his

eyes, with every step he takes forward, she is taking two back. He reaches her and

punches her square in the face, knocking her into the dresser. She feels the sharp corner

stab her in the back, and then she feels the blood rushing from her nose and few seconds

later, a slow, hot trickle of blood oozing from her busted lip.

As she slides down the side of the dresser, he grabs her by her robe and pulls her up to

him, he punches her twice in the side of the face, hitting her across her cheekbone,

and then complete blackness….

24 hours later

The Emergency Room

"Mr. Mulder, wake up…" he comes around slowly, to hear a strange voice which he

does not recognize. He looks around and realizes where he is. He is lying in a

hospital bed, his mind still a little clouded when the events from the night

before hit him. Attempting to sit up quickly, until he realizes he is in pain,

he then lies back a little, looking around frantically, "Diana? Where is she?"

he asks, very concerned.

"She is in the next bed, she was in considerable pain when she brought you in." Sitting

up slowly in bed with the nurse's assistance, he looks over at the bed next to him. It is

her, but she looks awful, he has never seen her in such a bad condition in his life, she

looks so pale and lifeless. He notices she has numerous bruises on her face and her lip

looks busted, and she appears to have multiple lacerations to her cheek and nose.

"OH MY GOD! What the hell have I done? Diana? Diana," he says quietly, trying to get

her attention.

Looking at him with pity, "sir, she is on pain medication, she probably wont wake up for

another half hour or so. In the meantime, we have to keep an eye on you, how are you

feeling?"

Looking at the nurse with tears running slowly down his cheek, "I am fine, I just need to

talk to my wife, what is wrong with her?"

Looking at her with deep sympathy, and then looking back at Mulder, "well sir, she

seems to have a broken jaw, I think that is all that was broken, it must have been a

terrible wreck."

Looking up at the nurse with a look of confusion, "what are you talking about?"

"Well sir, she said you were driving and you guys had a wreck and that you would

blame yourself due to the drugs and alcohol that you had in your system."

Looking at her with a look of confusion, "how did you know, I mean, what…"

Looking over his chart, which she had in her hand already, "we had to pump your

stomach, and honestly sir, we found a little bit of everything inside you. You will have to

fill out a report before you are allowed to leave, but that will come later, when you guys

get better, for now you should just try to concentrate on getting better."

Looking down at his arm where the IV is connected, he starts playing with the IV tubing,

with his mind racing, he looks back at the nurse, "can you leave me? I want to

rest for a little while, and on your way out could you shut the door please, my

wife likes the door shut while she is sleeping."

Nodding at him, "sure sir, no problem, I will be right outside, if you need anything, just

ring the desk," she replies with a sorrowful smile. She quietly walks out of the hospital

room, shutting the door behind her.

Mulder looks over at Diana, he gets up out of bed and takes his IV bag off the hanger

and walks toward her.

"Diana, " he says, walking to her bed, touching her chin with the tip of his thumb softly,

whispering, "I am so so sorry, I don't know what happened, I don't remember

anything."

Turning her head to look at him through the tears, and the one eye, which is swollen

almost totally shut by now, she speaks to him the best that she can, due to the swelling in

her face. "Shhh Fox, don't… you were under the influence, I am ok, I just have a

broken jaw, it could have been worse… much worse. You passed out and I brought

you in. They had to pump your stomach and they have your driver's license. I doubt that

you will get it back without taking some treatments and classes…"

Hurt and ashamed by what he has done, "I don't care as long as I have you, and know

that you still love me and will always be here," he says, sobbing.

Looking away from him, "well Fox, I do love you, I will always love you, but I am

leaving. I have been transferred, effective immediately, out of the country, I found out

yesterday, but I did not get a chance to tell you when I came home from work, you

know how things are sometimes. I will miss you terribly, but I think that we need to be

apart now, this transfer could not have come at a better time. It will make it quite a bit

easier for me to leave now, I have been thinking about it… for a few weeks

now. I think you need to be by yourself, work things out.

I want you to do one thing for me... please get some help, I want you to promise me that

you will do this for me Fox" she says, handing him her wedding ring.

Looking at the ring in his hand, looking back at her, he starts shaking and starts crying a

bit harder. "Diana no, don't do this honey, please, I am sorry, please don't leave me, I

can't do this alone, I don't know how to be alone, I love you. I need you to be with me,

I can't get through life by myself, after I lost Samantha, you were the one

person who believed in me and all my crazy ideas of what happened to her, now

you can't just leave me here to face this alone. I won't make it on my own, not

losing you, I need you with me, now more than ever, and don't you see that?"

Looking at him with concern and love. I love you too Fox, but I cant do this and

I wont, I am leaving , that is the decision I have made, and I hope that if you

truly do love me as you say you do, you will respect my decision," she says.

Looking at her as if he is totally lost, "I will respect your decision, I am so

sorry and I love you so very much, I will never stop loving you, Diana, I want

you to know that, and if you hate me because of this, I do understand. I am a

monster and I will file all the appropriate reports on myself as soon as we are

released. I just wish you would reconsider and give me another chance, "he says,

with the slightest look of hope.

Looking sternly at him, "no Fox, I cant do that, if I give you another chance, you and I

both know, that you will never get the help you need, you have to do this, for me, for

yourself," she says.

Getting up from the bed and sitting in the chair beside her, he puts his head down in

her lap and weeps like a baby.

He remembers falling asleep for the last time with her, his head in her lap with her running

her fingers through his hair, them both crying all night, until sleep got the best of him.

He awoke to see her still crying and still awake, yet full of love for him. That is the

moment that he knew, her decision was right. For the both of them. She should leave,

she deserves better than what he has given her.

All of the sudden, all these thoughts of his past are interrupted by a knock on

the door.

"Mulder, it's me, "says Scully, through his apartment door.

He jumps up and walks to the door, not realizing that during all of the memories, he has

been crying and is now wearing his old wedding ring.

Opening the door, he sees Scully, "Mulder, I …Jesus Mulder, what happened to you?

Are you ok? What is wrong," she asks, looking very concerned.

"I am fine, I was just thinking about someone, and my past."

Still looking worried, but knowing that he is Mulder and he will only tell her what he

wants to tell her, she tries to change the subject, "ok, well I thought since I was in the

area, I would drop the autopsy reports off myself so you wouldn't have to wait for the

fax."

Looking at the papers in her hand and taking the reports from her, glancing over them

"ok Scully, thanks, I am going to go to bed now, I am tired," he says, taking her by

the arm and helping her into the hall.

Looking at him strangely…but Mulder, I …" smiling at her "goodnight Scully, see you

tomorrow" shutting the door on her. Yelling at him through the door, "good night

Mulder," she says, with a sigh, then she walks off.

He sits on the sofa, picks up a bag of sunflower seeds, and opens them noticing

the wedding ring that is still on his hand. With a smile and a single last tear,

he walks toward the bedroom to put the ring back up, stops at the bedroom door,

and turns around. Walking back to the desk, he takes it off, drops it in the top

drawer, making a mental note to put it away in the bedroom dresser later, he

sits back down on the sofa, and starts thinking about Scully.

He starts to think about all of the things that they have been through together

in the past 6 years, all the times she has doubted him and he has doubted her.

All of the times that they have doubted everyone else but each other, and then

he thinks of how he treated her when she brought the reports to him.

He picks up the phone and dials her cell phone…ring…ring…ring…ring… "The cellular

customer you are trying to reach is unavailable" a look of worry crosses his face, hanging

up and dialing her home number he gets the machine, "Scully, it's me,

call me as soon as you get this message, its urgent." He hangs up the phone and

picks up his bag of sunflower seeds and starts thinking about the last case

before the X Files was reopened.

The bombing in Texas, the bodies, the bees... poor Scully. He thinks about all of the

trauma she underwent for his cause, why did she do it? She was a wonderful doctor,

why didn't she just go be a doctor? Why go through all of the things that she has been

through?

The X Files were just a job to her, nothing more, she did not have to do this every day.

She doesn't even believe in the supernatural. Was there a reason? If so, what could

be that important to her that she risks her life daily? He couldn't figure it

out unless, was it all for him? Surely not, there must be something more to it.

He started thinking about them being chased by the helicopters and running

through the corn and how terrified he was that he would not get to her in time

to give her the vaccine, he had a sudden flashback of her in the cubicle, in the

icy water. She looked so cold, so pale, and so fragile. He remembers wondering

if she were even breathing when he saw her pale face and empty eyes. He was

almost scared to break the glass surrounding her, for the fact that she may be

dead already and all because of him.

He was horrified at that thought, the thought of going to her mother and telling her that

her daughter had been killed because of him, after she had already lost Melissa. He

could not bear that, the thought of a funeral, the thought of going to work and not seeing

her sitting across the desk from him every day. Not seeing her eating tofutti dreamsicle

or yogurt with be pollen for lunch, not being able to joke with her abut it. Not being able

to try to make her believe in anything supernatural. He couldn't, he

lived for those elements, and he lived for the X Files. He could not risk losing

another woman that he loved due to his own selfish cause.

Wait, did he say loved? Did he love Scully? Was that even possible? The thought of the

news of her resignation flashed back to him, the tears in her eyes when he begged her to

stay on the X Files with him, for him. The time in the hall where they had

almost kissed, he then realized…he did love her. Though he loved Diana, it was

over between them, but Scully, she was there every single day, testing him,

listening to him, criticizing him, laughing with him, could she actually love

him as he loved her? Was it plausible for Dana Scully, woman of steel, ice queen, to love

someone like Mulder? Was this a possibility?

The ringing of a telephone interrupted these thoughts. Answering the phone with

a little frustration in his voice, due to the interruption, "Hello?"

Scully's voice comes across the line, "Mulder, I am home, I just got your message, what

did you need? Is everything ok?

Happy that she was the one to interrupt his thoughts, a smile spread across his face at

the sound of her voice. "I just wanted to apologize for the way I acted earlier, I had

been thinking about someone and I had no right to rush you off or treat you the way I

did, and I am sorry for hurrying you off like that. I do appreciate the fact that you came

all the way over here to bring the reports and try to disprove any belief that I may have

about this case though," he said, grinning.

Giggling at his accusations, "Mulder, your nuts, I did not try to disprove anything, I just

wanted to drop by, that's all. I figured that since I hadn't seen you since Friday and this

is Monday and I wasn't in the office today and I hadn't heard from you all weekend that

I should come by and see how you were."

Smiling, "so the answer is yes."

Confused, she says…"huh."

Smiling to himself, "oh nothing, nothing, just thinking about someone."

Curiously, she asked, "mind if I ask who?"

Thinking quickly, "Oh, uh, Samantha, I was thinking about out Samantha." With a look

of relief from them both, her for the fact that he was not thinking about Diana…and him

for the fact that Scully bought the lie about Samantha. "Mulder…get some rest and I will

see you in the morning, good night Mulder."

In a very mischievous tone, "Its' Fox…and goodnight to you too…Dana." She hears a

dial tone and she looks strangely at the phone and hangs it up.

"Hmmm, I wonder what that was all about, maybe I will call him back," she

thinks, picking up the phone. "No, this is just one of his silly little games

and he wants me to call him, besides, I am sure he will tell me tomorrow, at

least I hope he till tell me tomorrow, I hate when he makes me wonder like

this."

Deciding to go take a bath instead, she carries the phone with her to the bathroom. She

set's the phone down beside the bathtub and turns on the water. The conversation on

the phone runs through her mind. "Fox," thinking how strange it sounded, "Fox….Fox,"

yet how mysterious and sexy he made it sound at the same time, was that the plan, was

he trying to turn her on?

Fox, nobody calls him that, except for Samantha…oh and Diana," rolling her eyes at the

thought of Diana. She looks at the water, then walks to the cabinet beside the sink,

reaches in, and picks up a small bottle of bubble bath. She closes the cabinet

back and walks to the tub, she opens the Lavender and Eucalyptus bubble bath and

adds some to the water. She sets the bottle back on the sink, and then she slips

out of her work clothes and into the nice hot bath.

Ah, Lavender and Eucalyptus, I haven't had any of this since my vacation last year, I

don't know why I haven't bought some before now. Thinking back to her vacation last

year, remembering how may times a day Mulder called her while she was in Maine.

That thought makes her smile, "what would he do without me?" Then thinking again,

"what has he done without me? I know so little about his past, except for the

fact that Samantha has been missing since childhood that is all I really know

about Mulder's past. I know that some Phoebe "Green was in his life," rolling

her eyes again. "Oh and who could forget, miss perfect…Diana. Who exactly were

these women to him, and how much of a role did they play in his life?

Frohike, Langley and Byers now a little about Diana, but I am sure they don't know

much, after all , it is Mulder and he is going to keep it all under wraps about his

private life, right? On the other hand, what if they do know something? I wonder if they

could tell me anything about Diana? I wonder if they knew about Phoebe? Well, I guess

it is none of my business, I mean, if he wanted me to know, he would tell

me…right.

But then again, I am his partner and I do spend every day with him, and he knows about

Jack and I, and the relationship we had, well he knows enough,

but this is not about me…no, I will just leave it alone.

Sitting there in the bath, looking for something else to focus her mind on, finding nothing

to focus on whatsoever, she stands up, grabs the towel off the edge of the tub and wraps

it around her. Reaching over into the water, pulling the silver lever up to let

the water drain, she leans back up, and walks out of the bathroom, flipping the

light switch off as she leaves.

She walks to her bedroom, looks at her pajamas that are lying on the bed, picks them

up then drops them back onto the bed. "No way," she thinks, while walking to the

closet. She pulls out a pair of black jeans and a t-shirt that she got on vacation that says,

"MAINE" on the front, and "GOOD OLE' NEW ENGLAND HOSPITALITY" on the

back. She tosses them on the bed, grabs her shoes, and tosses them toward the bed

too, then she stops and listens, she hears the phone.

"Dammit" it is still in the bathroom, she runs down the hall to the bathroom and picks up

the phone. "Hello?" "Dana, honey? Are you ok? You sound a bit out of breath," Maggie

says. A little let down because it wasn't Mulder, "oh, hi mom, I am fine, I was running

into the bathroom to get the phone, I left it in here after my bath," thinking to herself, "I

cant believe mom called, I have things to investigate."

"Well, I was just wondering if you made it home, you hadn't called me and I was getting

worried. You know how I get when you do not call me. You know how worried I am

about you Dana, I was getting ready to call Fox if you weren't home, and…"

interrupting her, "Mulder, mom…call him Mulder."

"Well, anyway Dana, we are supposed to have lunch tomorrow and I

was wondering if you still wanted me to pick you up or not," thinking to

herself, I wonder what Mulder is doing for lunch tomorrow, "Dana? Are you still

there?" "I'm sorry mom, I know you get worried about me, and I forgot to call,

but yes mom , pick me up for lunch, sorry, I was thinking about work.

So I will see you at noon tomorrow." Sounding a little sleepy, "OK honey, see you

tomorrow, get some sleep, goodnight Dana." "Goodnight mom." Hanging up the

phone, she walks out switching off the light as she leaves…this time, taking the

phone with her.

She walks back into the bedroom, and she begins to get dressed, then she walks

over to her coat, pulls out her wallet, and throws it on the bed with her

t-shirt, she picks up her t-shirt and pulls it on, then she sits down and puts

her shoes and socks on. She grabs her coat, hangs it in the closet, and closes

the closet door. She walks back to the bed and sits down. She reaches over and

picks up her wallet. She pulls out her ID, under her ID she has some papers

folded up, which she pulls out. One is a picture of Emily, one is a picture of

Melissa, one is a picture of she and her dad and one is a picture of she and

Mulder at one of the FBI yearly functions, though she cannot remember which one,

probably a Christmas party. Then she pulls out a yellow post it, folded really

small and unfolds it. She opens it to reveal a phone number, she picks up the

phone and dials it.

After the first ring, she hears Langley's voice," Hello," "Langley, this is Scully, are you

guys up for a while?" Hearing Frohike in the background and a couple of other voices

which she cant quite make out, but figures it is probably just he and Byers watching

television, probably a show about some government conspiracy or something of that

nature.

Sure we are, you know we never sleep," he says, laughing. Ok, well I need some info

from you guys, could I swing by there sometime tonight," she asks, crossing her fingers.

"No problemo, see ya in a bit."

Smiling, "thanks, Langly, see you in a little while, bye," she replies, hanging up the phone

without even waiting to hear him say goodbye. She set's the phone down on the charger

and grabs her wallet off the bed. She walks out of the bedroom, switching off the light on

the way out. She then walks down the hall to the living room, she grabs her coffee coup

off the table, walks to the kitchen, sits it in the sink, walks to the door. Flipping off the

living room light, she walks out locking the door behind her. She walks out to her car

and gets in, starting the car she starts to drive.

While driving, she thinks about the last time she asked the boys about Diana,

and they uncovered, what seemed to her some interesting things, which of course

Mulder didn't believe.

Why didn't Mulder believe her that time? Was he that serious about Diana? What

exactly did they have before her? She continues to think about Mulder and then she

arrives at the drive, puling into the drive, she turns off the car and starts to get out.

Wait, she thinks, what the hell am I doing? This is none of my business, it is Mulder's,

not mine, and…no, it is mine too. I am his partner and it is only fair that I know what he

went through in his past in order to maybe understand why he feels the way he does

today, right? I mean, if her were to ask me about my past, I would, well maybe not tell

him everything, but I would tell him anything that I thought would affect our working

relationship.

Getting out and shutting the car door, she looks around, then walks to the door and

raises her hand to knock on the door. As her hand comes into contact with the door, she

taps one time and the door opens, to none other than, the one and only … Fox Mulder.

With a look of surprise on both of their faces, she turns around and walks toward her

car…"Shit, shit, shit…think Dana," she says while walking to the car.

"Hey, Scully, wait up…what are you doing here? Scully, stop."

Turning around to face him, "well, uh Mulder, I , uh wanted to uh, find out a think or two

about, uh, nothing, never mind, I have to go home and go to bed, I have a lunch date

with my mom tomorrow, uh…nite," she says, turning around and walking toward the car

again.

She feels his fingers around her arm. "No way, you aren't getting out of this one that

easily sweetheart, "he says with a really mischievous grin. "What were you here for

really? Are you in trouble," he asks, looking a little worked. "Why didn't you call me

Scully? Don't you trust me? I am your partner, and you should call me first before

anyone else…I" interrupting him, "they why don't you be hones t with me?" Turning to

face him…" I was coming here to find out a few things."

Looking at her strangely, "about what Scully? What is so secretive that you can't even

share it with your partner?"

Looking up at him with the slightest look of hurt in her eyes, "Exactly, Mulder, that is

what I was coming here to find out," she says, looking down. Thinking to herself, I

shouldn't have asked, it was none of my business and now he thinks I am going behind

his back. Well, I was going behind his back, but no like the thinks.

He brushes a few strands of auburn hair out of her face, and she looks up at him,

"Mulder, I want to know about your past, all of it, including Phoebe Green, and Diana

Fowley."

He looked at her with the strangest look she has ever seen, which makes her wonder if

she should have even asked him this, and then without saying a work, he turns and walks

back into the door and closes it.

She runs up toward the door. As she opens the door, the boys are all three standing in

the doorway as she peeks around the door to see Mulder gathering his things and he

shoots a glance at her to make sure she notices him pick up a photo album and he walks

to her and hands it to her, then he walks out the door.

In Unison, "bye Mulder" from the boys.

She turns to look at them, looks down at the book, looks out at Mulder walking

toward her car and looks back at the boys.

"Well, Scully, you better go, he is waiting," says Frohike.

"Bye guys, thanks for the help, or something," she says, walking out. She gets to her car

to see Mulder in the drivers seat, so she walks around to the passenger seat and gets in.

Handing him her keys, she looks at him and sees that he is upset, so she decides that she

will just sit quietly until they arrive home.

The silence or guilt, one of the two, gets the best of her, as they are driving.

Looking at him, "Mulder, I am sorry, it is none of my business, you don't have

to tell me anything, I know that I have overstepped my boundaries with you and I

am sorry. I can take you home and we can forget that any of this happened."

He stops the car at a stop sign and looks at her, "Scully, I just want you to trust

me, if this is what it takes, this this is what I will do."

Noticing another car behind him, he starts driving again, she realizes that they are going

to Mulder's apartment, not hers, which she doesn't mind, it is a change for her,

and she has always felt at home there anyway.

They arrive at Mulder's, they get out of the car and this time, he waits for her, without

taking off like usual. Which she notices and thinks peculiar, but then again, he is Mulder.

They walk through the lobby, get on the elevator and walk to the door, not another

word being spoken.

Great, she thinks "he is going to give me the silent treatment, but I

deserve it, I was being nosey and untrusting."

After opening the door for her and letting her in the apartment, he follows her inside. He

shuts the door, flips on the light switch and locks the door behind him.

She walks to the sofa and sits down, he looks at her and smiles that pathetic Mulder

smile that we all know and love, which makes her smile back.

"Do you want anything Scully? I am going to have an iced tea."

"Sure Mulder, that is fine."

He reaches into the almost empty refrigerator and pulls out 2 of

the 3 bottles of iced tea that he has in there. He shakes them and opens them

bringing them to the sofa, and then he sits down.

"Ok, let's do this, what do you want to know?" She looks at him and then looks down,

as if she shouldn't be asking anything of him. "Mulder, I … interrupting her, "No Scully,

you went there tonight looking for answers… answers that I haven't given you. And I

am here to give them to you, I want you to trust me Scully, you are very important to me

and your trust is very important too, so please, feel free to ask me anything you want.

Looking at him, "Mulder the last time I asked about Diana, I had went to ask the boys

and you got offended by it and I don't want to offend you ."

"Scully, Diana is a very touchy subject, one to which I was not prepared for when I

arrived there and I got offended because I was not prepared to talk about it, and

because you didn't ask me, you asked them. Scully, if you feel there is anything…

anything ever you want to ask me, feel free. Feel free to ask me, don't feel like you have

to go to the boys. Diana and I used to be together."

"Mulder, you don't have to tell me, really, I do trust you, I was just wondering why I

didn't ever hear of any of these people from your past before, that is all I was

wondering. Frohike told me that Diana was your chickadee, I knew you two dated, that

isn't what is important to me, it is…"

Interrupting her again, "Scully, we were married."


	2. chapter 2

Looking down at the photo album in her hands, with a look of utter surprise, "what? Married? Mulder, you? Married? Why didn't you ever tell me this before? How…when…I don't know what to say to you Mulder, I didn't know you were ever married." Looking down at the bag of sunflower seeds which he has dug out of his pocket, he takes one out and pops it in his mouth. Looking at him, "Phoebe Green?" Smiling at her, "no, we were together, but it wasn't long, or serious. Phoebe was in London. Diana was here." Looking at the photo album, she then looks at him, and then back at the album. He reaches over her an opens it, to a surprising Mulder in a black tuxedo and Diana in a wedding dress. She is very jealous and upset to see this, but she doesn't show it, because first of all, she would not show Mulder any of her emotions, unless something was just too shocking or upsetting and she couldn't control herself, which, by the way, is very rare for her, and second of all, on studying the photos, she realizes Mulder was very very happy then. "You loved her very much didn't you?" Looking at Scully, "I still do." Her heart sinks to the pit of her stomach at these words, she feels a lump rise in her throat, and feels as if she is going to be sick….take a breath Dana, just breathe, don't let him see you this way, she thinks to herself. "But it is over between us," says Mulder, interrupting her thoughts. "I can honestly tell you, I will always love her, but we will never ever be together again, too much has happened, I have done too much…" interrupting him, "Mulder she is the one who was working against you. You haven't done anything." Turning his head and getting up off the sofa, he walks to his desk opens the drawer and pulls out a red file, one which she has never seen before. He pulls out some reports and pictures, and hands them to Scully. Taking them from him with a confused look on her face, she opens the files and takes out the picture and reports. She starts reading the repots, seeing medical reports of a woman with multiple lacerations and contusions to the face. Also seeing that this person has a broken jaw, but not noticing names or details, and then she pulls the pictures form behind the reports…it is Diana. She assumes that it is after a case and Mulder, being the person he is, feels bad because he wasn't able to get to her in time. Well he didn't get to me in time either, if he had been home when I called him that night that Duane Barry abducted me, maybe he could have gotten to me too. Wait, stop blaming him for this, this is not his fault, just stop. He feels bad enough already, I mean, I went through that with Jack and it was very hard on him, thinking to herself. Though in all reality, her helping him was probably what helped her through the trauma itself. "What case was this Mulder?" Looking out the window, ashamed to look at his partner, "The case of Fox Mulder, the drunk, coked up FBI agent, who beat the shit out of his wife one night." Scully looks at him, then at the reports more closely and sees that his signature was there, he filed these reports on himself. She drops the reports on the floor, she looks at him as if she is in shock. She gets up and walks to the table, grabs her keys and walks out the door, slamming it shut behind her. He turns to see the reports on the floor where she dropped them and to see the door shut. He walks to the door and opens it to see her getting on the elevator and closing the doors. He starts to go after her and then stops, wondering exactly what she is feeling about him, so he decides to leave it as it is. He walks to the pile of papers on the floor and picks up the folder, putting the papers back in the folder, he lays it on the sofa. He then walks to his desk and picks up his telephone, he looks out the window and he doesn't se Scully's car, so he assumes that she is on her way home. With this in mind, he dials her cell number, ring…ring.."Scully," he noticed that her voice was shaking and sounded very unlike her, she sounded scared when she answered the phone. "Scully, its me, I…I don't know what," interrupting him, "Mulder, I am driving, I can't talk to you right now, " she replies, hanging up on him. He dials her home number, thinking to himself, what have I done. I tried to keep this hidden from her, so she would think less of me, but by doing that, she already thinks less of me, and now that she knows the truth…"You've reached the Scully residence, I'm not in right now but if you leave a message, I'll get back to you," Beep. "Uh, Scully, it's me again, please call me when you get this message, I'll be waiting for your call, thanks," sounding so unlike himself, he hangs up the phone. An hour goes by, no return call, 1 ½ hours, no return call, so he picks up the phone and dials her home number again. "Hello," she answers, sounding as if she has been crying, "Scully, please don't hang up on me, I need to know if you hate me or not, at least tell me this before you hang up," realizing how desperate he sounds, but not really caring at the time. He just sits patiently waiting for an answer. "Mulder, I …I just don't know what to make of all this, I…" searching his mind for anything to keep her on the line with him. "Scully, can I come over and w can talk about this?" "Mulder, I don't think that is a good idea, I am," interrupting her, "Scully, please let me talk to you about this, I didn't get to finish telling you all you wanted to know and," cutting him off, "Mulder, I know plenty, thanks," she says, in a hateful but still shaky tone. "I am going to bed now Mulder, I will see you in the morning, good night," she says, hanging the phone up on him. Thinking to herself, that bastard, how could Mulder do something like that? That is not possible, there has to be more to it, that is definitely not the Mulder that I know, I can't believe he would…wait, stop this Dana, you are putting the blame on Mulder for what happened to you, you can't do this. If you hope to keep your secret, you sure as hell can't blame him. Besides he would never hurt you, you didn't hear the whole story. Her thoughts drift to her past.


	3. chapter 3

MULDER'S RESIDENCE

He picks up the phone once more and starts dialing, then he decides, maybe she just needs some time to take it all in, so he hangs up the phone and walks to the sofa. Lying down on the sofa, he starts going over all of the episodes that just happened and he falls asleep. Tossing and turning all night, he awakes to a phone call. "Hello," he says still half asleep… "Mulder, it is 8:15, where are you?" "Dammit! I fell asleep on the sofa and didn't set my alarm, I am on my way," hanging up the phone, grabbing his jacket, he runs out the door. He gets into his car, not caring that he has on the same pair of jeans and t shirt that he had on from the night before, he speeds out onto the road. The drive to work was excruciatingly long, he finally pulls into the parking lot and finds a spot to park in. After parking the car and locking it up, he goes into the elevator and heads up, not knowing what to expect when he arrives. As he exit's the elevator, he heads down to his office. He opens the door quietly to see Scully sitting at the desk going over some files. He looks at her and smiles. She looks at him and smiles back. He walks in the door and as he is approaching the desk he can feel the tension building. "Mulder, about last night, " interrupting her, "Scully, you don't have to explain anything to me, I just want to know that you don't hate me and then we will pretend this never happened." "No, Mulder, because it did happen and I am glad that it did. I have a lot of things I would like to discuss with you but now is not the time or place so what do you say to dinner at my place, to make up for the way I acted last night?" With a sigh of relief, "yes," he says. Looking at him strangely, "and what exactly is that you are wearing," she asks him, grinning. "Well, I decided to go with the casual look today," he says, smiling at her. "Looks like its 2 day old casuals," she says with a look of disapproval. Looking at her with that "pity me" face that nobody can pass up, "I'll try better next time," he says with a grin. Smiling back at him, "ok, so let's go over this case. Skinner just brought this down and he asked where you were, I told him you were getting coffee, so you may want to check in to see if he really needs something or if he is just being Skinner." Walking around the desk, Mulder reaches over Scully and picks up the phone, dialing Skinner's extension. Scully gets up and lets Mulder sit down to use the phone. After his conversation with Skinner, they go over daily files, each one thinking about what would be said at dinner tonight. They exchange a few thoughts and opinions about cases and there is a knock. They look up to see Maggie at the door. "Dana, honey, are you ready?" Looking surprised, "oh, yeah mom, I forgot, we have a lot of new things surfacing here and my mind sort of slipped. Let me grab a few things and I will be ready." "Sure honey, no hurry." Looking at Mulder, "Hello Fox, how re you today?" Looking down boyishly, "Hello Mrs. Scully, I am fine, thanks…how about you?" "I am fine, thanks for asking." Scully hands Mulder the files and she walks out, "see you in a a bit." Smiling and waving as they head out, "have a nice lunch, ladies." While Scully is at lunch, Mulder goes through files and eats a sub sandwich. Scully returns after what was only 45 minutes but seems like hours to Mulder. "Hey, how was lunch," he asks. "It was nice, thanks, how was yours?" "Oh, same old thing, files and a sub." Smiling at him, she takes her stuff and sits it down behind the desk. They finish the day as if the night before never happened. At the end of the day, she and Mulder at getting their things together and she says, "so, how is 7:30?" Looking a bit surprised that she didn't pass it off like the night before, "sure, 7:30, I'll be there." Handing him his coffee cup, "see you then," and with that she was gone.


	4. capter 4

6:30 P.M.

Mulder's Apartment

Mulder goes into his apartment and jumps in the shower. After taking a shower he puts on a pair of black jeans that are a little too tight, but he figures, what the hell, they will stretch out, and a white t-shirt that hugs his body almost as well as the jeans. He walks into thee living room, sits on the sofa and puts on his shoes. He then gets up and grabs his jacket and his workout bag, thinking to himself, I thin I will go jogging after dinner.

6:30 P.M.

Scully's Apartment

In the meantime, Scully is cooking which she doesn't do often due to the fact that it is only her. She cuts up some vegetables and seasons them. Then she puts them and the rice in the steamer. After turning on the steamer, she cuts up a salad. She then gets out the dinner rolls that she picked up at the deli on her way home. She makes a quick sweep of the house to make sure there are no unsightly things lying around, she then pours a glass of soda and sits down to wait on the food and Mulder.

7:15 P.M.

Scully's Apartment

Scully just finishes setting the table when she hears a knock at the door. Setting the last of the silverware on the table, she walks to the door and opens it, to be greeted by Mulder's smile. "I know I am a little early, but better early than late, right?" Smiling back at him, "that's fine Mulder, come in." He walks in carrying a bottle of White Zinfandel. Handing it to Scully, "I hope you like White Zin," Mulder says, with a questioning look in his eye. "Well, actually," she says, picking up a bottle of the same exact thing from under the cabinet, she looks at him and smiles. "Well, I guess we will have plenty for dinner," he says, looking at her with a grin. He walks to the table and sits the wine down beside a plate, then walking toward her he says, "Is there anything I can do?" "Well, you can pour the wine if you would like to," she says, handing him two wine glasses. Walking into the living room, Scully walks to the CD player and turns on some classical music. As she is walking back to the kitchen, the phone rings, she stops and turns around and walks back to the living room where the telephone is. Picking up the telephone, "Hello, oh, hi mom, no I am having dinner with a friend right now, can I call you tomorrow, no mom, I will be fine, yes mom, ok mom, I will call you when he leaves, yes he, no it is Mulder, ok, I will talk to you tomorrow then, I love you too mom, ok, bye." Looking at Mulder, a little embarrassed, "sorry, it was mom, I will call her back tomorrow," she says smiling. After placing the phone back on the charger, she returns to the kitchen. "No problem," he says. Maggie is very overprotective he thinks to himself, but I guess after losing Melissa and after all that Scully has been through, with the abduction, the cancer, the bees, I guess you would be protective. They both walk to the table and prepare to sit down and eat, as Mulder pours the wine. After they are both seated, Mulder looks at Scully, "So, what else did you want to ask me?" Looking at Mulder apologetically, "Mulder lets not do this now, after dinner we can do this," smiling. Looking a little surprised and relieved, "Sure, fine, so, how was your evening up until I arrived," he asks, trying to start a conversation. "It was fine, I actually enjoyed cooking a meal, since I never have a reason to actually cook for someone other than myself." "How was your evening so far," she asks him. "Well, it was ok, I showered and come over, and that was about it." They ate dinner in a rather quiet fashion, not much was said, mostly small talk, work, television, family. After they were finished with dinner, Mulder helped her take the dishes off the table and they put them in the sink, "I will put them in the dishwasher later, "she told him." He then poured them another glass of wine and they both took their glasses and went to get comfortable on the sofa. After they were both seated on the sofa, Scully reached over the the table beside the sofa and picked up the remote to the cd player and turned it down a little, so that they could hear each other without having to raise their voices. "So, Mulder," she says, "what exactly do you want to tell me?" Looking at her, "well, I will tell you whatever you want to know, I used to have lot of problems,, which took me a lot of therapy and rehab to work through, but I have done it and it has made me a better person, and no my therapist did not tell me to say that," he says with a smile. Smiling back at him, "well, I feel as if I have overstepped our boundaries in the first place, so I have no questions, all I need to know now, is that you area right, and everything else is your business and I am sorry for invading your privacy, I apologize," she says, looking down at her hands, rubbing them together as if she is nervous. "Scully, really, there is no need to apologize, I understand, really I do, I mean you told me about Jack Willis and Ed Jerse and I didn't even bother to tell you about Diana or Phoebe, I do understand and you do have a right to know, I am the one who should be apologizing here, not you." Looking at him, with a little hurt in her eyes, "Mulder, there are a lot of things you don't know about me, that I haven told you , not because I was trying to hide anything from you, but because I have tried to put the past behind me and I realized last night, that you were doing just the same. And I just went and dredged up the past for you, without your permission or any regards to your feelings and that is why I am sorry." "Scully, really, I am willing to tell you anything you want to know, anything…Diana and I got a divorce soon after the domestic dispute and I got into rehab and I hadn't talked to her since the divorce was finalized until she showed back up in the X files division. I had tried to have contact with her and she would never reply, I don blame her, though at the time I did blame her, for everything. I just didn't understand her side, I was hurt, scared and alone and I hated her for making me do this on my own, but I understand now. As far as Phoebe goes, we weren't that serious, we were just mostly study partners, though anatomy sometimes fit into the study guide, if you get my drift, " he said, smirking at her. This however didn't bother Scully, the fact of him and Phoebe having sex, it wasn't serious like it was with Diana. Now she wasn't really worried about Diana anymore either, for some reason, all her worries, and jealous feelings, were gone with the words he had just spoken. "Well, I really don't have anything to ask you, you have answered all my questions, I just feel bad for getting into your business in the first place, and I still want to say I am sorry" "It is fine," he says looking into her eyes and reaching over and putting his hand on hers, which is holding a glass of wine. "I really mean that Scully," he says, trying to convince her. Looking at his hand, and then at him, "thanks Mulder, for not holding it against me, I don't think I would be so forgiving," she says, looking back down at her knee, which she has now folded in her lap. She has the other leg dangling from the edge of the sofa. "So, what all have you not told me, or do you not care to talk about it," he asks her in a questioning but not pushy tone. "Actually, I have thought a lot about it since the discussion at your place, I wasn't going to tell you anything, but I have decided that I want no secrets between us, so I have decided to tell you everything about my past, that is, if you want to know," she says, waiting for this answer. Thinking to himself, of course I want to know, you are Scully, my friend, my partner, I want to know everything about you, from your favorite wine, which I now know, 2 points for me, to your favorite massage lotion, that is if you even use massage lotion…these thoughts were interrupted by a soft touch on his hand. Looking at Scully, "oh, sorry, I got a little lost in thought there, of course I want to know, I want to know everything, you are my partner and I want to get to know you, I doubt you well let me really get to know you, but I will take what I can get," he says to her, smiling. "Ok, I will be right back and then we can talk about everything," she says, getting up and walking to her bedroom. She walks into her room and opens her top drawer in the filing cabinet inside her closet on the left hand side. She pulls out a big, blue file, and opens it. She looks in it and walks out of the room, leaving the filing cabinet drawer open. She walks back into the living room and over to the sofa, sitting down the file on the table beside the phone. "Would you like another glass before we get started," she asks. "Sure, but I will get it, do you want another," he asks her. "Yes, I would love another, thanks." After filling up their wine glasses, he returns with their glasses and also the bottle of wine under his arm. "Now we are set" he says, putting the glasses on the table along with the wine, file and telephone. He then picks his glass back up and walks to the end of the sofa and sits down. "A toast, to our pasts and our future," he says, raising his glass. "Uh, yeah, to that," she says, with a clink of glasses, she set's the file in his lap, they both notice her hands shaking as she sets the file down. He looks at her for a second, "Scully, you don't have to do this," he says to her. "No, Mulder, I do, it has been on my mind for 6 years and now is the time to put this nightmare to bed for good," she says. Taking a big drink of wine, and then placing the glass on the table, she reaches over and opens the file that is sitting in his lap. This reveals an X file case #101494, which turned out to be Duane Barry. Looking over the first page then looking at Scully strangely, "Scully, these are old cases, I am not sure I understand." Reaching over and taking the folder from him, Scully picks up a few pages and lays them on the table beside her. She then hands him the folder back. He looks at her strangely, then back down at the folder in his hands, he picks a page containing personal information. He starts reading it…


	5. chapter 5

Chapter 5

NAME: Dana Katherine Scully

D.O.B. 2/23/64

Looking up at her from the papers he was reading, asking her strangely… "these, these are your files," he asks with a look of confusion. Looking back at him, she nods her head and returns her attention to the arm of the sofa, where she begins picking at a little piece of lint. He looks back at the pages and starts reading the files. Past the info, he goes to the next page, which contains a photo of Scully, showing multiple contusions and lacerations to her face, a small patch of maybe 3 or 4 sutures on the left side of her chest, right above her left breast. Turning the page with disbelief, he comes to another photo. This photo shows numerous lacerations on both hands and arms. Close up of her hand, focusing on the top of her wrist, with about a ½ inch cut closed carefully with more sutures, also noticing bruised knuckles on her right hand. Turning the page, thinking to himself, "my God, what happened to her," he comes to the final page, which is another photo. The final photo is one of her from the back, showing about a 5 inch cut from her right shoulder blade, down at an angle toward her left hip with multiple bruises. Looking at the picture, he notices the cut isn't deep enough to require sutures, more like a deep scratch actually, but it will probably still leave a scar. He turns back to the information page, expecting to see a diagnosis/prognosis/treatment sheet, but he comes to more pages of an old x file. Looking at her strangely, he starts reading carefully over the information page again, thinking to himself, "maybe I just overlooked it."

DIAGNOSIS: N/A

PROGNOSIS: N/A

EXPLANATION OF EVENTS: N/A

PHYSICIAN: N/A

ADDITIONAL NOTES: PATIENTS CONFIDENTIAL RECORDS ARE BEING KEPT ON FILE WITH THE PSYCHIATRIST AT THE FBI OFFICE.

Not finding the information he had hoped for, he looks on the backs of the information sheets…nothing. He looks on the back of the photos…nothing. Looking at her again, he notices she is still playing with the piece of lint on the arm of the sofa, he turns his attention back to the file and lifts the x file cast paper up to find yet another photo. This one containing her legs, from the thigh down, multiple bruises and a laceration on her right leg below her knee and one on her left shin. Next page is another X file, one which he is very familiar with, X file #73317, her X file. Flipping quickly through it, for he has read it numerous times and he has it memorized due to his photographic memory. He still finds no more information. Looking at her again, this time a little tired of looking for the answers when she could just explain to him, he asks her quietly, "I still don't understand, Scully…what the hell happened here?" Looking up from the arm of the sofa, she begins with a shaky voice. "Well, when I was working with Jack, um…Agent Willis, at Quantico, we came across this case and Jack and I solved it an caught the murderer. The guy had been put in jail, and he was awaiting trial. Well, during the trial, I testified against him, Jack was going to testify, but since he had admitted to the murders and felt no remorse, it was pretty much an open and shut case. He was sentenced to life, and he was sent back to jail but he somehow managed to escape that night. This was on a Friday night and Jack and I were planning on meeting that night to go away for the weekend. We were both taking our own cars because I was coming home a day earlier. I had packed my stuff the night before, so after the trial all I had to do was throw my things in the car and leave. As I went to put my bags in the back, I leaned over the trunk to put my suitcase in and I blacked out. When I awoke, I looked around to see where I was, and I knew the place, it seemed very familiar, but there was something wrong, I couldn't remember where it was or where I knew it from. I heard a familiar voice and when I turned my head to look, I saw him, and it took a second but it came back to me, it was him… Eric Wilkins. I looked at him and tried to think of something, anything, but my mind was in a fog. I went to reach for my gun when I realized, I had no gun and I was sitting in a kitchen chair with my own handcuffs on my right hand, handcuffed to the chair I was in. My left hand was behind my back and I had a rope tied around my abdomen and woven through the wood in the back of the chair. I tried to think of something to do to try to get myself free, but to no avail. I shook my head in hopes of clearing the fog that hovered over my thoughts, but it didn't work, and that is when he told me that I had been drugged, but that the drugs would wear off in the next half hour or so. To my disappointment, he was right, if it hadn't worn off, maybe I wouldn't have been awake enough to remember, though that didn't help me during the experience with Duane Barry." Interrupting her… "Scully, if this guy was a murderer, how did you get out alive?" Looking at him and then back at her lap, taking the last sip of wine left in her glass, "Jack…he had taken me to Jack's house. I realized it was Jack's place when he dragged me through the living room. That is why it looked familiar, that is where I remembered it from. Jack came home, after going to his mother's to visit her before we left, Jack walked in on him. Jack was surprised and caught off guard, but he still managed to shoot him in the back." Looking at her with another confused look, "Ok, Scully, but you said earlier, you remember something about Duane Barry, why haven't we closed your case then? Why didn't you tell me? Why didn't you tell Skinner, or your mother?" Looking at him and looking down again, "because Mulder, I already filed a report on Wilkins, and it was humiliating enough and hard enough on everyone including my mother. I won't put Mom through that again, especially over Duane Barry." Looking at her, "Scully, there is a file you could have closed, don't you want everyone to know that you remember now and we can close your case? Don't you want your mom to know? Don't you want Skinner to know, and what about telling me? Were you not going to tell me? Don't you want all the people that care about you to know that you are ok now, and that you didn't lose your memory after all? Why didn't you just tell me Scully," he asks with a look of hurt in his eyes. Thinking to himself, "I knew she wouldn't trust me, I mean, I wouldn't trust me either, I couldn't save her from Duane Barry…she called for me, nobody else…me, and I couldn't even help her," these thoughts were interrupted by an angry snapping voice. "Because Mulder," she snapped, "Skinner does know, I told him quite a while ago, but he also knows about Wilkins too. I told him that I would not sign papers to close the case, I want it kept under wraps, and I have told you now, can't you be happy with that," she asks, getting up and storming out of the room. She walks down the hall, leaving him sitting on the sofa. He reaches over and picks up the other papers that she laid on the table beside where she was sitting. He starts putting them back into the folder. He notices that two have fallen onto the floor and he reaches down and picks them up. As he glances at them, one being info on Duane Barry and the other being more info on Scully, he starts to put them into the folder. He stops when he notices the last one has Scully's signature on it. He stops, sets the folder down beside him on the sofa and starts reading the page with the signature. He notices it is a police statement.

"Agent Willis and I were planning on taking a weekend trip. I went to my car, where I was abducted by Eric Wilkins. Who then drugged me, and took me to Agent Jack Willis' house where I was beaten and raped and I would have probably been killed, except Jack, um, excuse me, Agent Willis, came home, shot him in the back and threw him onto the floor. Agent Willis then took the handcuff keys from Wilkins, who was lying on the floor unconscious, removed the handcuffs from my left hand, which was handcuffed to the bed and then carried me to the sofa and laid me down there. He then proceeded to call 911 and then a backup unit. He helped me to get dressed into a pair of his jogging pants and a t shirt of his and he helped the EMT's to assist me to the ambulance, while the other agent and other ambulance took Wilkins. He accompanied me in the ambulance to the hospital. I was examined for trace evidence which came back positive and also numerous lab tests were done which all came back normal. Medical reports have been filed at the hospital, though they were to be kept out of public records. A copy has been filed with my therapist and she has given the hospital a copy of her records of our visit as well, which are also to be kept out of the public records."

Looking up from the paper as if he had seen a ghost, he drops the papers on the sofa. He thinks to himself, "that bastard, how could anyone hurt Scully? And why the hell wasn't Willis there earlier? How did she get through that without me? And more importantly, why the hell didn't she tell me before now? Why did she wait for 6 years after our partnership began to tell me this? Does she not trust me? Oh, of course not, Duane Barry, it all comes back to Duane Barry, I should have been home, I should have been waiting for her call, I should have," she starts talking to him, interrupting his thoughts. "Mulder, I am a little tired, I think I am going to call it a night." He looks up at his partner, with tears in his eyes, and he reaches over and picks up the paper and places it on top of the folder and hands it to her. "What is…" realizing what it is, she turns very pale, as if all of her life force has been sucked out of her into the paper itself. She drops the paper and grabs the arm of the sofa to keep from tipping over, due to the light headedness she is feeling. Seeing that she is not doing too well, Mulder grabs her arm and helps her to sit down on the sofa. Looking at her as if his heart has been broken in two, "Scully, why didn't you tell me before now? I could have helped you…why? I understand that you don't trust me after I let you down during the Duane Barry case, but…" Looking at him surprised, but still clearly upset, "What? Mulder, I didn't tell you because I was ashamed, not because I didn't trust you, I do trust you, I trust you more than anyone." Reaching onto the ground and picking up the folder and the statement. Looking down at the statement, she starts to read it as if it is someone else's file. Mulder sits beside her on the arm of the sofa, watching her to see if she is ok, still feeling upset for all she has been through. She stops reading, looks down at the paper and crumples it up into a ball and pelts it across the room. Still looking at her, he notices tears streaming down her face, he rises from the arm of the sofa and sits on the floor in front of her, so he can see her. "Scully, I am here, I will help you through this, I am so sorry." Turning her head away from him so that he cant see how upset she really is, the hurt, anger, rage and true fear that is coming back to her. She uses what little strength she has left to regain control of her emotions for him. After a few minutes of silence, she turns back to him, "Mulder, I think you should go, I had a nice time at dinner, but I am feeling really tired and I would like to get some rest. I will call you tomorrow and we can…" "No Dammit," he says angrily, interrupting her, "you are not doing this, you are not going to relive this again by yourself, I am here to help you. I am your partner and I am your friend and I care deeply about you and I don't want to see you go through this on your own, so either you tell me or I will be forced to tell A.D. Skinner that we have new information on X file #73317 and I will sign it myself. I hate to do this to you Scully, but you know and I know that after talking about cases like this, that sometimes,actually most of the times, the victims relive it and I don't want you to do it alone. I want you to let me be here with you. Please Scully, let me help you, I couldn't help you when you asked me, when you needed me, I wasn't there and now I am and I want to help you." Sitting in silence for a long time, Mulder gets up and walks to the sofa and sits down beside her, waiting for her answer. She looks up at him and drops her head into her hands and starts to cry. Putting his hand on her shoulder, "Scully, I am here," he says, looking at her through his own tears that he knows she is unaware of, or at least he hopes so, he has to be strong for her. She looks up at him and wipes a tear from his cheek, "Mulder, I am tired, I want to go to sleep now," she says. Looking down at the floor, he stands up, he picks up his keys and starts walking to the door. She watches him as he approaches the door, she really wants him to stay, but Mulder cant see her like this. It is not like Scully to show how upset she is, especially around Mulder, she always handles everything better than that. "Ok, Scully, I will go, but please call me if you need me, I will talk to you tomorrow, I will call you when I get home too," he says as he closes the door quietly behind him. She stands up and walks to the door and locks it. She walks back to the sofa and sits down. She starts thinking about the night Duane Barry broke through her window and how she had called for Mulder but he never came, and she started to get scared again. Then the thought of Eric Wilkins came back to her, how no matter how many times she punched him, directly in the face, with all the strength she had left, he would not get off her, how she had called for Jack, just like she did for Mulder, when she needed him to save her from Duane Barry. Walking over and picking up the phone, she dials Mulder's cell phone number. "Mulder," he says, in a shaky voice. "Mulder, I was wondering if…never mind," she says, hanging up the phone. Looking strangely at his cell phone, dialing her number, it rings once and she answers it quickly. She sounds scared, with a fragile little voice, "hello?" "Scully, I am on my way up, I will be there in a minute," he says. With a sigh of relief, "thanks Mulder," she says, and then she hangs up the phone. Standing up, she paces in front of the door for what seems like hours but is really just 5 minutes or so. She then hears a knock and knows that it is Mulder, she peeks out the door and sees him with a bag in his hand. She opens the door and he walks in, sitting his duffel bag on the floor, he closes and locks the door behind him. She looks at the bag strangely, "Mulder, are you traveling?" "No Scully, I just have my workout clothes in the back of the car. I was going to go for a jog after dinner, but after our talk, I didn't really feel like jogging so I decided I could put those on and wash the clothes I am wearing now, if you don't mind, that is," he says with a smile. "Oh, ok…well if you go change, I will put your clothes in to wash, I have to wash some of mine anyway," she says. Looking at her with concern, "will you be ok alone for a minute? I will go change and be right back," he says, walking down the hall to her bedroom. It only takes him a couple of minutes but it seems a lot longer to Scully. He comes down the hall in a pair of jogging shorts and no shirt with a heap of clothes in his hand. "Where do I put these?" he asks. Standing up and taking the clothes from him, "I will go put them in to wash now, be right back," she says, walking off. As she takes his clothes to the laundry, the scent of his cologne permeates the air around the heap of clothing in her hand, she stands and breathes it in for a second with a sigh. The sight of him walking down her hall in his shorts and no shirt, gave her the chills. She puts the clothes in the washing machine and turns it on, then walks back in the living room. Mulder is not in there, so she walks down the hall and notices the bathroom door is shut. She then decides to go to her room to change clothes and put on some shorts and a t shirt herself. Mulder is in the bathroom, splashing some cold water on his face, trying to think of how to handle this situation, with any normal person, it would be no problem. But this is Scully, his partner, he stares at himself in the mirror, as if to get an answer then he slowly opens the door, to see a reflection of Scully's bare back in the mirror. He notices a thin white scar down her back, but barely visible, if you didn't see the photo, you probably wouldn't notice it. Thinking to himself, "wow, her back is really beautiful, I never imagined Scully's back would be so sleek and muscular," he slowly shuts the door back. "Wait, what the hell are you doing Mulder," he thinks to himself, you can't be looking at Scully while she is changing clothes, you are in her house dammit! And after all she has been through, she doesn't need to know her partner is swooning over her back." She finishes putting on her clothes, she walks by the bathroom door, and as she is walking by, Mulder opens the door. Jumping, "Jesus Mulder, you scared me," she continues to walk down the hall to the living room. Though he did scare her, actually a little more than she let on, she didn't let him notice. The thoughts of the past were slowly fading from her memory with every minute, which she was glad of. Though in the back of her mind, they were still lingering, and this meant, she wouldn't sleep…as usual. And with Mulder there for the night, it could make for a long night, what if she had nightmares, she didn't want to keep Mulder awake, and she definitely didn't want to bother him with this shit. Mulder follows her into the living room. "Well, Scully, let me clean up the kitchen for you, I mean, you did cook for me and do my laundry, it is the least I can do," he says, as he starts to put the dishes in the dishwasher. "Mulder, you don't have to do that, I will get it," she says. "No, Scully, I want to do it," he says, smiling at her. "So, Scully, are you feeling better, I mean, not that I am here with you? Is there something you want to talk about? Is there something I can help you with or get anything for you? I want to help, but I don't want to be too overbearing or pushy, so if I start getting that way, just…" interrupting him, "I am fine Mulder. Really, though I must warn you, I will probably have nightmares tonight, if you want to leave later, I will understand. I am just glad that you came back for a little longer, my mind was starting to rehash old events and I don't need that right now, you know, once the person starts thinking about it, the whole event resurfaces and things that would be forgotten or put behind, seem to reappear and that is not the outlook I am looking for," she says, watching him while he continues to put dishes in the dishwasher. "Scully, you are talking about yourself as if you were talking about a case we are working on or as if you are referring to a patient. You have to realize, this happened to you, not one of your patients, or friends but YOU, Scully. And I don't know how you dealt with it before but you and I both know that it will take some crying and breaking down to deal with itagain. Once it has resurfaced, you know how hard these things are to deal with and I don't want you to think I will think any less of you for anything you have to do to deal with this thing. I don't understand how anyone could ever want to hurt you, and I am having a hard time dealing with this myself, so I know it is going to be hard for you. I know I have done my share of crying tonight," he says, looking at her with bloodshot eyes, which she didn't notice before. "Mulder, I didn't realize it would affect you this way, I wouldn't have told you had I known it would make you look at me as a victim and make you this upset. I never wanted that, I just wanted to be honest with you about my past and…" interrupting her, "Scully, of course it affects me. I care so much about you and anything that happens to you or has happened to you affects me. The thought of anyone raising a hand to you enrages me, and if I had known this before the case with Willis, I would probably have killed him, and I mean that Scully. I cant control my anger when it comes to people that I care about, and I am sure you know this by now, but I had no idea about any of this before, I am not sure you would have been able to save Willis from me," he says, looking down at the dishwasher, trying to hide the hatred and anger in his eyes. "Mulder, don't blame Jack, he saved me from Wilkins, I probably would have been dead right now if it weren't for Jack coming home." "Oh yeah, well what the fuck took him so goddamned long Scully," he yells, slamming the dishwasher door shut. "Mulder, don't do this, I need you to not be angry or upset now, this is a healing period for me, for us…and I need you to understand that." Looking ashamed, "I am sorry Scully, I didn't mean to upset you or scare you in any way, if I did, I just…" interrupting him, "Mulder, I could never be scared of you, except maybe last Christmas, but all that aside, I trust you more than anyone, I trust you with my life and I know that you would never do anything to jeopardize that trust, Mulder and I am grateful for that. And to tell you the truth, Mulder, I think that one of the reasons that I haven't told you before now is due to the fact that you do get so angry and do have such a problem with you rage, and I didn't want it to affect any of our cases." Looking at her with a look of sadness, "I am sorry Scully, I am so so sorry, I don't know how to handle this or what to do or say to help you, I can say I am sorry but that wont make it any better or make it go away. It has happened and there isn't a damn thing either of us can do about it except try to deal with it and get on with our lives the best way we know how, right?" He turns around and flips the light switch over the sink and walks into the living room and sits down on the sofa. Scully follows and sits down beside him. "Well, Mulder, I really am getting sleepy, I think I will go to bed now, I would like it if you could keep an eye out for me while I am sleeping," she says, looking down as if she shouldn't be asking anything of him. Looking at her and smiling, "of course, where do you want me to sleep," he asks, hoping she isn't taking anything he says offensively. "I have a recliner in my room, if you don't mind sleeping in a chair, that is…but you can sleep on the sofa if you prefer," she says, silently hoping that he will choose the recliner. She really wants to know that he will be in the room if she does wake up and need him. "I will take the recliner," he says. So they check the locks and switch off the lights and they head into the bedroom. She pulls the blankets back and crawls into bed looking so warm and comfy. Mulder looks at the recliner, thinking, "man…what did I agree to?" Walking to the recliner, he switches on the little lamp beside the bed, he then walks over and switches off the overhead light. Smiling at her and leaning over, he kisses her on top of the head, "Sweet dreams Dana," he says. Looking at him, "You too Fox."

Note: If there is anyone reading this, please let me know if you want me to post the rest of the story, please send reviews...thanks.


	6. chapter 6

Chapter 6

1:08 A.M.

Scully's Bedroom

Mulder still sitting awake, watching over Scully notices, she is restless. He gets up from his chair and goes to her bed. He sits on the side of the bed, he then notices, she is dreaming, as she said she probably would. He reaches over and puts his hand on hers giving her hand a slight shake, "Scully, I am here, wake up," he says. She jumps, sitting up quickly in her bed, she looks at Mulder and looks around her room, a little more at ease, and now a little more awake. Looking at him with a little fear in her eyes still, "Mulder, will you come lie down beside me, I don't like to be in the bed by myself when I am having nightmares. After the rape, mom came and stayed with me for a while. She would lie in bed with me, it seemed to help…I mean, if you don't mind," she said. Now looking down at her hands, rubbing them together as if she is nervous. Looking at her with worry in his eyes, "Scully, I will do anything you need me to do to help you get through this, if it means sleeping in that old uncomfortable recliner for months," he says, grinning. He pulls the blankets down a little beside her and he slides into bed. It is just as warm and comfy as he had imagined, only now he is lying beside the woman that he loves, though she doesn't know that. It is still enough to make him happy. He lies there for a while, watching her as she rubs her hands together, cracking her knuckles, playing with the blanket, doing anything she can to keep from having to go to sleep and face the nightmares that she knew would return. Sleep takes over and she dozes off, looking very peaceful. After about 45 minutes, Mulder notices she is getting restless again, he watches her for a few minutes hoping that she will get comfortable and rest. She still tosses and turns, so he reaches over to her and puts his arm around her, hoping to calm her, or give her a little feeling of being safe. She jumps at the touch of his hand and sits up, wide awake again. Realizing that he was only trying to comfort her, she starts to cry, "I am sorry Mulder, I know you were only trying to help, I am sorry, I didn't mean to make you feel bad," she says to him. Looking at her with worry, "Scully, you didn't make me feel bad, really…do you want to tell me what happened that night? Do you think that will help you? Do you want to talk to your psychiatrist? Do you want me to call your mother? Just tell me what I can do and I will do it, and I don't want you to feel bad for jumping when I touched you, I am sorry, I didn't mean to scare you or upset you or make you feel threatened in any way. As long as I am with you, I promise you, nothing will ever happen to you. You don't have to apologize to me for anything, I am just trying to help you right now, so let's not focus on my feelings," he says, smiling at her. "Thanks Mulder, for everything, I know that you already know how much of a friend you are to me, but I want to remind you again, how much I really do appreciate everything you have done and are doing for me." Lying down, she reaches over and grabs his hand tightly. Looking at her with a little smile, "you don't have to thank me for anything Scully, really, I want to help you, no matter what I have to do." With that, he leans over and kisses her on the forehead, lays down beside her and they drift off to sleep.

8:15 A.M.

Wednesday

Scully's House

They are both jolted awake by Scully's telephone ringing. Jumping up, she looks over at Mulder with a little surprise at first, then remembering, she smiles a little smile. After all, he is asleep and he won't be able to catch her enjoying the fact that they are together, she then picks up the phone. "Hello," she answers sleepily. "AGENT SCULLY! ARE YOU ALRIGHT? It is 8:15 and you aren't at work, and… (pausing for a moment, then speaking with disapproval) neither is Mulder," says A.D. Skinner. A look of panic sweeping over her for a second before she thinks of what to say, "I am sorry sir, I haven't seen Mulder since yesterday, but I overslept, I am on my way," she says, hanging up the phone quickly. Looking over at Mulder with a grin at the peculiar way he is laying, shaking him softly, she whispers, "Mulder, wake up, we overslept, Skinner just called and…" He interrupts her at the mention of Skinner, "Shit, I'm up, I am on my way," he says, jumping out of bed, and then falling over her boots which just happen to be on his side. He falls to the floor with a loud thud. Looking down at him from the bed, with a grin, "sorry Mulder, I always keep them on that side of the bed," she says. Looking at her with a smirk, "sure, no problem," he replies, as he runs out of the bedroom and into the bathroom, he quickly jumps in the shower. As Scully hears the water start to run, she drags herself out of bed and walks to the closet and grabs a suit, her underwear and her shoes. She lays them on the bed and walks to the kitchen and opens the fridge, getting out a bagel and the cream cheese, she sits them on the cabinet. She then grabs the coffee and pulls the filters out of the cabinet, as she starts to put coffee into the coffee maker, she realizes, it is already done, all she has to do is turn it on, so she pushes the button, thinking to herself, when did I do that? Oh well, so she toasts her bagel and puts cream cheese on it and then she hears Mulder fumbling around in the cabinets in the bathroom, which makes her smile. Then he runs into her room and shuts the door. "SCULLY! SCULLY, COME HER A SEC," he yells from the bedroom. Walking into the laundry room, she reaches into the dryer and grabs his clothes from last night, and then she takes them to him. Opening the door when he hears her coming down the hall, he says, "I need my…oh, thanks," he says, looking down at the towel he has wrapped around his waist. He shuts the door and she hears him walking away from the door. Walking back into the kitchen, she grabs two cups and pours coffee into them both, then grabbing her bagel, she sits down for a second at the table. By the time she finishes her bagel, Mulder is ready for work, (Mental note to myself; he looks really good in my towel.) Getting up and walking towards the bathroom, "Mulder, our coffee is on the counter," she replies, while continuing down the hall and into the bath, closing the door behind her. "Oh, yeah, Scully, I prepared the coffee last night, hope it was ok with you," he yells down the hall at her, and then he walks to the counter and grabs his cup. He carries his cup over to her briefcase, where he knows she has a pen and a pad of paper. He looks until he finds them, then scratching out:

"Thanks for coffee, went to office, see you there!

Mulder

Then quickly ripping the paper off the pad and putting the pad and pen back in the briefcase, he lays them beside her coffee cup on the table and let's himself out, locking the door behind him.

Stepping out of the shower, walking into the bedroom, she closes the door behind her. After quickly dressing and turning off the light, she walks into the kitchen and over to the table, where she picks up the note Mulder had left for her. Smiling at the gesture of him actually taking a moment to tell her where he is, she drinks the last of her coffee and picks up her briefcase and heads out the door. Realizing when she gets outside that her hair is still wet, she turns around and goes back in. Walking inside, she drops her briefcase and she runs down the hall to the bathroom. Taking the blow dryer from the cabinet, she plugs it in and dries her hair quickly, she then throws the blow dryer under the cabinet and walks back out of the bathroom, down the hall and back out the door, locking it behind her. She walks outside to find that her car is no there!  
"Where the hell is my car?" Turning around to go call about her stolen car, she turns quickly, glancing at what she hopes is a mistake. "Shit!" she replies. The cell phone starts to ring, "Hello," she says in an angry voice. "Hey, Scully, I took your car, you bring mine, we will switch out at work," Mulder says anxiously. "Mulder, what the hell were you thinking? Why did you take my car," she asks, sounding very pissed off. "I grabbed your keys this morning in the dark and instead of going back, I just took your car, hope you don't mind," he says. "Ok, Mulder, I am on my way to work, in your car…I will be there soon, and don't tell Skinner you were here last night," she snaps, hanging up on him. Mulder closes his phone and shoves it in his pocket. He then quickly runs past Skinner's office and into their office, hoping that he hasn't been seen. He quickly grabs a few files and throws them on the desk and begins working diligently. He hears footsteps and the doorknob turn and he mutters a few choice words under his breath, as A.D. Skinner enters the room, quietly closing the door behind him. "Nice to see you have decided to grace us with your presence Mulder," he says, glaring at him madly. "Sorry sir, I would have been here on time, but I got distracted," looking down at the files on his desk as if hoping they will give him a little help on getting out of this one. "Well, never mind that, I have a meeting to attend this afternoon and I need to get the reports from you guys, I am assuming that agent Scully has them," he asks, looking at his watch, then back at Mulder. "Yes, she has them in her briefcase, I don't know where she is, she should have been here already, I called her house and there was no answer," Mulder replies, hoping that he has gotten out of this one. "She is going to be late this morning, I called her this morning and she said she was on her way," Skinner says. Then the door flies open, almost hitting Skinner, who just happens to be standing right beside the door. In stomps Scully, throwing Mulder's keys on the desk, "the next time you decide to take my car without asking me…" Mulder shoots a look at her then at Skinner quickly, and then he looks down at his files. Realizing that Skinner is here, waiting for the reports that she has, she looks at him. Her face turning a little red now, she looks down at the briefcase in her hand. Looking nervous, "Oh, ah, good morning sir, I am sorry I was late, I overslept and uh…let me get the reports for you," she says, fumbling in her briefcase. She finds then and hands them to him clumsily, and shoves the briefcase under the desk. "Thank you Agents, I will be back to discuss this….this matter, after my meeting," Skinner says, with a look of disapproval on his face, then he turns and leaves, slamming the door shut behind him.


	7. chapter 7

"Well, that was just great Scully, just what we needed, well, I guess, we should jest tell him the truth, I mean, we didn't do anything to get in any real trouble over, I just drove your car and you drove mine, and I stayed wit you because you weren't feeling well, so there is nothing really to explain," Mulder says, in a convincing way. "Right, we haven't done anything to get into trouble, except being late, and everyone is late for work once in a while," Scully replies. Walking over to him, she reaches over his shoulder and grabs a file that he happens to be reading, she then takes it and walks over to her chair and sits down and starts reading it. Looking at her with disbelief, then rolling his eyes, he picks up another file and starts reading it. They continue to go over files quietly, for an hour or so, and then the door knob turns again, and in walks Skinner.

"Scully…Mulder," now let's discuss this matter of you two showing up for work late, and exactly how you two got your vehicles switched," he says in a curious tone. "Well, sir," Scully says, "I called Mulder over last night, I wasn't feeling well and he stayed at my house for the night," she replies, turning her attention back to the file in hand. "And this morning, it was dark and I grabbed her keys instead of mine by mistake and that is how the cars got switched," says Mulder. Glaring at them both angrily now, "Agents, I don't know what is going on between the two of you off the clock, buy you know that nay personal relationship between partners can cause a lack of responsibility at work, an you know that I will not tolerate a lack of responsibility on either part, I don't want to hear any more about you two doing whatever it is that you do after work together, I just want to know that the jobs will be done on time," he says, turning on his heel and quickly exiting the office with a bigger slam of the door than the last time he left.

Looking at each other for a second, Mulder starts to grin mischievously; Scully shakes her head at him in disbelief of what Skinner has just implied. "I cannot believe you Mulder," she says, "you are just loving this aren't you, it isn't enough that we are in trouble, but Skinner thinks that's we are doing God knows what after work and you think it is funny!" Looking at her with a bigger grin, "Oh, come on Scully, you were flattered at the thought of me spending the night with you and you know it, come on, admit it, you know you want me," he says, starting to laugh now. Looking at him with a warning look, "cut it out Mulder," she snaps, "we are at work, and we are in enough trouble because of me , you don't need to make it any worse, so just shut up and get to wok," she says. Looking at her, due to the fact that the whole conversation has embarrassed her, and her face now matched the color of her hair, "Ok, ok, I will lay off, I am sorry, really, it was just as much my fault as it was your," he says, looking down at his desk, smiling really big now, "if I wasn't so good, you wouldn't have been up all night and we wouldn't have been late," he says, laughing again. Looking up and ducking to dodge the file that she has just pelted at him, he then straightens up and gets serious again. They finish the day in the office, going over files. Every now and then, he sneaks one in on her, smiling and saying in a feminine voice, "OH MULDER!" while avoiding thing being thrown at his head. The day passes rather quickly. At the end of the day, he walks her to her car and helps her in, he then watches as she pulls out of the parking garage, with a smile and a wave, she is gone. While walking to his car, his cell phone starts to ring, "Mulder," he answers. "Hey, sorry about us getting into trouble earlier," Scully replies, "I am going to go home and take a hot bath and go to bed, and I will see you at work, on time, in our own cars, in the morning…nite Mulder," she says, smiling. "Nite Scully," he says, hanging up and shoving the phone into his coat pocket. He gets into his car and drives home.

1:17 A.M.

Mulder's Apartment

He is lying on the sofa, flipping through the channels on the television, when the phone rings, "hello," he says sleepily. He hears a slight sniffle and a soft voice on the line, "Mulder, can you come over," Scully says. Sitting up quickly, a worried look crossing his face, "Scully, is everything ok, are you ok?"

"Yes, I am fine, I just wanted some company," she says, sounding a bit better. "I am on my way, let me just grab a couple of things, and I will be right there," he says, already walking towards his bedroom. "Ok, see you in a bit, and Mulder…thanks," she says, hanging up the phone. Grabbing things for work the next day, getting a couple of last minute things, he is out the door in a flash. Getting into his car and throwing clothes across the seat, he starts the car and heads out. "Wow, she really must trust me, to actually call and ask on her own…for me to come over, that is so not like Scully to ask me for anything," smiling at the thought that she is starting to let him in, finally, after six years of working together.


	8. chapter 8

1:57 A.M.

Scully's Apartment

Scully is sitting on the sofa, thinking to herself, I don't really need him here tonight, why did I call him, I think I just wanted his company, he makes me feel safe, and he is my partner and he is also alone, so why not have him spend the evenings with me right? I mean if he doesn't mind and it doesn't go any father than friendship, why not. Dana Katherine Scully, what are you doing, you cannot have him over here every night, it isn't fair to him, to have him taking up his time with you, and it is crazy! I won't ask him again, tonight will be it, and this will be the last night, but the thought of him in bed beside me, the thought of him walking down the hall in his boxers and no shirt. STOP IT DANA, THIS IS YOUR PARTNER! All of these thoughts are interrupted by a knock on the door. Getting up and walking to the door, looking through the peep hole, she sees Mulder smile. Opening the door to her partner, she smiles and takes his bag and walks to the bedroom and set's the bag down beside tie bed, next to her shoes. While she is putting his bag up, he closes the door and locks it behind him. Then walking to the bedroom he passes her in the hall, as she continues with a smile, to walk into the living room, he hangs his clothes for work on the door knob and walks back into the living room. He walks to the sofa, where she is laying stretched out, head up on one arm of the sofa and feet a few inches from the other. He picks up her legs with a grin and sits down, laying her feet across his lap. "So, what is on the agenda for tonight, strip poker or naked twister," he asks, grinning mischievously. Ducking as she throws a pillow that she has grabbed from the floor, "MULDER!" Looking at him and grinning back, thinking to herself, "wow strip poker huh, no no, stop it, you can't be thinking about your partner like that, it isn't right." Interrupting her thoughts, hello, Earth to Scully, where are you, what are you thinking about? Huh? Huh? Come on, tell me, you know you want to, was it me? Huh? He asks, with that sexy Mulder smile that she has grown to loves so much. Smiling at him with a real sarcastic grin, "no Mulder, not very likely I was thinking about…well, I was thinking about, um, Queequeg, I miss Queequeg," she replies, hoping that he buys it, but knowing immediately by the look on his face that he doesn't, she quickly starts thinking of something else to tell him. "Well, well Scully, exactly what kind of a relationship did you and Queequeg have? I saw that same look that I saw when you were looking at Sheriff Hartwell, I mean, I don't think that Queequeg makes you think like that, at least I hope not," he says, laughing. Ducking again as she throws the second of three pillows. "Mulder," she yells at him with a grin. "Eww, Scully, I like how you yell my name out like that," he says, laughing. "Mulder, Mulder, Mulder…" he says, in a feminine voice, mimicking her with a raise of his eyebrow, "and don't you throw another pillow, it is your last one and you should save it for a good one." Rolling her eyes, "whatever Mulder," she says with a grin.

Sitting up and pulling her feet from Mulder's lap, she walks into the kitchen and grabs two cans of coke from the fridge, and hands one to Mulder. "Wait," she says, taking his back from him and running back to the fridge, she returns with a root beer, "here, sorry, I forgot about your true love," she says, laughing and handing him the root beer. "No, Scully, that is you, I already told you once that I love you and all you said to me was "oh brother" he says. "Anyway, Mulder, so how was your night, until I called you I mean," she says, looking a little red and down at her coke with a small grin that she hopes he doesn't see. "Why the big smile, are you planning something for me tonight," he asks, raising his eyebrows and puckering his lips. Ducking the third pillow, "I told you to save it for a good one, Scully I wouldn't consider that one good enough to waste your last pillow on," he says. Leaning towards the table to get her coke, Mulder leans forward to pick up the pillows that she has thrown at him quickly, causing them to bump foreheads. "Ouch," she says, giggling. Looking up, she meets his eyes, when she sees something that she hasn't noticed before…passion, fire, love…for her. Sitting there for a second, just staring at each other, they both are frozen in the moment. Looking into her deep blue beautiful eyes, he sees how much she cares for him, as he does her, thinking to himself. "Mulder, get yourself out of this." Sitting up, he grabs her coke and hands it to her, blushing a little himself, "sorry," he says, looking down with a smile. Looking at him, then down at her can of coke, "thanks Mulder," she says quietly with a smile. They sit in silence for a few minutes, then feeling the intensity in the room growing, "Scully, I am going to take a shower, I will be out in a few minutes," he says, smiling at her. While walking down the hall, he says under his breath, "a cold shower," which, she just happens to hear. Smiling to herself, she gets up and turns out the lights, checks the doors and walks into the bedroom and over to the bed. She flops down on the bed and grabs a magazine from the table and stars flipping the pages when the phone rings. Jumping and answering it, "hello," she says. "Dana, I was just calling to check on you, I couldn't sleep and I thought you would be up so," Maggie says. "Mom, I am fine, I am just sitting here reading, Mulder is in the shower and then we are going to bed," she says, not realizing that she has just told her mother about Mulder being there. "Dana, are you and Fox…involved? I can't believe you didn't tell me, I …" she says, before being interrupted by Scully. "No mom, he was just over and we were working, nothing personal," she says, as she looks up and sees him at the foot of her bed, in a towel, listening to the conversation with a big smile on his face. "I have to go mom, I will call you tomorrow, no mother, good night!" she says, hanging up. She looks up at Mulder, starting to blush, "that was mom, she was just checking on us…uh, me, I mean, she was calling since I didn't check in with her, she was calling to check on me, and oh, never mind," she says, knowing that she isn't getting out of this.

Looking at her with a mischievous grin, "well what did you tell mommy? Did you tell her how you were yelling out my name earlier? Huh? Did ya? I know she is waiting to know everything about her little angel, so…Dana…what did you tell her," he asks, with a raised eyebrow. "Mulder, I am going to take a shower now, and mine doesn't have to be a cold one," she says with a wickedly sarcastic smile. Looking at her with his mouth agape, and starting to blush a little, "you heard that?" Already walking into the bathroom, yelling at him from around the corner, "yes Mulder, I heard you, I never knew I affected you in such a way," she says, giggling and shutting the bathroom door behind her. Walking over to the bed, he reaches down and grabs his bag and throws it onto the bed. Opening it and taking out his boxers and throwing his bag back onto the floor beside her shoes, he closes the bedroom door and puts his boxers on.

In the bathroom, Scully fumbles around in the cabinets gathering towels and shampoo and conditioner, since Mulder used the last of it and didn't bother to put any more into the shower for her, thinking to herself, "how considerate." Finding the last towel, she turns on the water and slips out of her clothing and jumps into the nice, hot shower. She lets the stress from the day drain away from her body as the hot water runs over her. After standing in the shower until the hot water starts to cool, she decides to get out and go to bed. Few thoughts cross her mind while she is getting dried off and dressed. Picking up her clothes from the day and her wet towel, along with Mulder's socks that he left in the floor, she wraps up in her robe and walks into the bedroom. She opens the door to see Mulder lying spread eagle across the bed, reading the most recent copy of the New England Medical Journal that she has on her table beside her bed. "Mulder, I am impressed, I never knew you were interested in the medical news," she says, with a proud smile. Looking at her with a grin, "actually, Scully, I was reading the article on Labor and Delivery, I was thinking of becoming a gynecologist," he says, with a laugh, taking off his glasses and placing them on the table beside the bed along with the journal. Glancing at the table, thinking to herself, "wow, he was wearing his glasses, of course I would miss it, and he looks good in his glasses. I remember the first time I met him, he was wearing them, I thought, woah, what a cutie and then I got to know him and, what was I thinking…wait, he is still a cutie, actually, he is getting more and more hot every day and …" interrupted, by a waving hand in front of her face. "Hot, yes, I mean…um," she says, realizing that her thoughts have actually escaped her lips and this one, well this one was going to be a tough one to get out of.


	9. chapter 9

"So, Scully, who are you thinking about that is so hot, could it be…Skinner? I know about that kiss on the elevator, he told me all about it; I know how much you like to rub that bald head of his…or maybe, Frohike. Yeah, or maybe, Eddie Van Blundht. Maybe even me…yeah, I bet you were thinking about me, I know you were thinking about me in my Speedo weren't you. Yeah, it is red; actually, it is almost the same shade that your face is turning. Woah, there it is, that is the color," he says, stopping now that she is completely embarrassed. "Mulder, I was not thinking about anyone, or anything, just how hot the water was in the shower, that is it, now can we got o sleep please," she says, totally aware of how much he is enjoying the embarrassment she is showing. "Sure, hottie, anything you say," he says, with a sexy wink. Letting out a deep breath, hopefully, this is the last of the picking on me for the night, she thinks. Tossing the dirty laundry in the corner into the basket, she walks toward the bed. As she approaches the bed, Mulder gets up off the bed and helps her take the pillows off the bed and pull the big blanket back, then he fluffs up the pillows and lays them back down on the bed. Smiling at him, she hands him a pillow and a blanket and he walks towards the recliner. He puts his pillow and blanket on the chair and walks to the lights switch beside the door and flips it off. He then walks over to the bed, where Scully is crawling in under the blanket and getting comfortable, and he sits on the side of the bed beside her and brushes an auburn wisp of hair out of her face. Smiling at her and kissing he on the forehead, "I just want you to know that I think it was very cute when you turned as red as my Speedo, and I hope you aren't too mad at me for all the bugging," with a smile, he stands up and walks to the recliner. Looking at him and smiling back, "no, Mulder, of course I am not mad at you, I bug you just as much, but you just don't get embarrassed as easily, that is all, good night Mulder, I will see you in the morning," with a sweet smile, she reaches over and flips off the lamp beside the bed. A few moments go by and Mulder hears Scully settle down and he starts to get comfy, then he closes his eyes and starts to actually go to sleep, when he hears a soft voice. "Mulder, are you awake," she asks quietly. "Yeah, what is it," he asks, sitting up. "Nothing, I am just not really tired, that is all, do you want to come lie down over here and we can talk, unless you are sleepy, and then that is ok, you don't have to I…" Interrupting her, "Scully, you don't always have to explain yourself or defend yourself with me when are you going to learn that? You can ask anything of me and I will do what I can to help you, don't you know that?" Walking towards the opposite side of the bed, he is running into things with almost every step. Scully can't help but giggle at every, "Ow, shit," that comes with every stumble. Reaching over, she flips on the lamp, squinting her eyes a little, due to the brightness. Mulder walks to the bed without tripping on anything else and Scully lifts the blankets, letting him crawl into the warm, comfy bed next to her. She sits up, putting her pillow behind her back against the headboard. Mulder, does the same, only, he grabs another pillow from the floor and uses two. "So, what is on your mind Scully? Is something bothering you or you just want to talk," he asks, a little concerned. "No, no, it is nothing, I just cant sleep, and I figure, since we are both here and neither of us are asleep, we may as well chat, right," she says. Looking at her, he sees that she is looking down at her hands, which she has in her lap and is playing with a corner of the blanket. Tilting his head down a little, to get her to look at him, their eyes come into contact, and she smiles and looks up at him. Keeping eye contact with him, they start talking about the day, the files that they went over, a few of the things that would need to be done in the morning at the office, a few field reports that need to be reviewed and submitted to AD Skinner. They continue to talk until Scully's eyes start to get a little droopy and she starts talking in that soft, sleepy tone, that Mulder finds so sexy, but knows that Scully doesn't know this. As she finishes a sentence, she opens her eyes a little, making contact with his, noticing that he is looking deeply into here eyes and he is mesmerized by her, her voice, her looks, her mannerisms, everything about her. She blushes a little, but die to the fact that she is tired, she decides to let her guard down a little and this time not look away. As they sit there for a few minutes, staring into each others eyes, he slowly opens his mouth so speak. "Scully, I…" with that, he leans over to her, placing his hand on the back of her neck and softly pulling her toward him, not breaking the gaze, he softly places his lips on hers. After a long, soft, passionate kiss, he pulls away, realizing that he has just kissed his partner, which is definitely not a good idea on either person's part, when she reaches over to him and starts kissing him again. Looking at her strangely, noticing that her yes are shut, and she is still kissing him, he closes his eyes and kisses her back. After a few more long, soft, passionate kisses, Mulder finally decides to speak. "Scully, I am sorry, I don't know what came over me, I mean, no I am not sorry that I kissed you, I have wanted to kiss you for a long time, I just didn't know if you wanted to kiss me back, I don't mean if you wanted to kiss me…dammit, what I am tying to say…Scully…I love you, I have always loved you, I never wanted to admit it, because I feel that I should not have the pleasure of loving someone as wonderful as you. I mean, after what happened between Diana and I, and me not getting Duane Barry…I blame myself for that, I probably always will, but I do love you and I just hope that me telling you how I feel doesn't change anything between us as my partner or my best friend, because I know that even though I love you, I know that you will probably never love me the way that I love you and I am sorry for taking advantage of you and kissing you, I mean, you invited me here tonight…" interrupting him. "Mulder, it is ok, I wouldn't have kissed you back if I didn't want to, I do care deeply about you Mulder, I do and I don't k now if anything can ever come of our relationship. I know that Skinner will not be pleased, but I would like something more from our relationship, I want to be more than your partner, I was so hurt when I saw you with Diana at the facility where they were keeping Gibson, I walked down the hall and I say you two holding hands, it hurt me, it hurt bad and I walked out to my car and I called you. I was in the car when you told me to come meet you two there, but I didn't want her to be there with us, I know it may be selfish, but I don't feel as though I should have to share you with her, I know she is your ex an everything, but you are my partner now, and I am sorry, I am being really selfish. I just want to say that I really did enjoy the kiss and I would like to take our relationship to the next level, if you feel comfortable with that," she says, sounding as if she is hearing herself from a million miles away, but not embarrassed about it this time.


	10. chapter 11

Looking at her with disbelief, "Scully, what are you asking me? You want …" interrupting him, "Mulder, I want you to…I mean, I want us to…"taking a deep breath, looking deep into his eyes, "Mulder, make love to me." Looking at her letting his jaw drop open at the words that he has only heard in his fantasies. "Scully, are you sure? I mean…" thinking quickly, realizing that he is at a loss for words, she interrupts him again. "Mulder, I am sure, I have thought about it a lot, I want you to make love to me," she says, pulling the big comforter off the bed and onto the floor into a pile. Looking at her, taking her head in his hands, he starts kissing her lips, then slowly kissing down her neck, as she trembles at his touch. He continues kissing down her neck to where her robe forms a V, he slowly pulls the robe down, over hear breasts, opening it down the front, exposing her stomach, past her hips, down her thighs, and lets it fall open on each side of her. He slides one arm under her soft back, lifting her up a little to pull the robe from under her, where she will be more comfortable, she arches her back a little to help him. Then lifting herself off the bed a little, she helps him pull the robe from under her and it joins the comforter already in the floor beside the bed. He continues kissing her starting at her neck, and down to her breasts, his entire body shaking now, due to the fact that he is a little nervous, I mean, this isn't just another woman. This is Scully, and everything has to be perfect. Continuing down to her stomach, noticing she has her belly button pierced, looking up at her, "Scully, I never knew you had a piercing, I think it looks very sexy on you," he says with a smile, continuing to kiss her stomach. Blushing a little, she says, "thanks, Mulder, I just recently got it, I thought t would make a cute addition to my tattoo, and Mulder, please, call me Dana, I like it when you call me Dana, I feel closer to you," she says, as a slight chill runs up her body, and a smile of pleasure crosses her face as his lips touch her soft skin. "About that tattoo, I do love it, I am sorry for the way that I acted when I found out about it, I was just a little jealous at the thought of another man seeing your back and being with you, if you guys were actually together, but that doesn't matter now. I love you , Dana, and I have been waiting for a long, long time to make love to you , and I want you to call me anything that you want, including Fox, though I hate it, I will love it coming from your lips," he says, kissing her softly above her left hip. As he continues down her left thigh, kissing her softly, down to her knee, her shin, and calf. Pausing a second at her ankle, letting his lips hover over her skin, just enough to brush her ankle softly, he kisses the top of her foot and starts on the other foot. Kissing his way up her leg, first ankle, then calf, shin, knee, thigh, back up to her right hip. Continuing up to her soft stomach, up to her breasts, back up her neck to her lips. After another long, passionate kiss, her raises up a little to look into her eyes. "Scully, are you sure you want to do this?" Looking at him a little concerned, "Mulder, if you don't want to I understand," she says, feeling a little rejected and hurt but hoping that he doesn't notice. "No, no, I want to do this, I have for a long time, I just don't want it to be something you regret in the morning," he says, with assurance. "I promise you, I will not regret it in the morning, and I will still respect you in the morning too," she says to him with a little grin. After making love for hours, rolling over on her side to be face to face with him, "Fox, I do love you, I don't want you to think that I don't, I have loved you since the beginning, and my love for you grows more and more every day." Looking at her and smiling, leaning toward her until his lips meet hers for a long, passionate kiss, telling her the same thing without saying a single word. She rolls over and lays her head on his chest, falling asleep together; they both sleep better than they have in a long, long time.

6:00 A.M.

Scully's Bedroom

The sound of an alarm wakes Scully, after yawning, and looking a little surprised to find herself naked, lying across Mulder's bare chest, then she remembers last night. With a big smile, she leans over and kisses his lips to wake him, with a soft kiss back, eh opens his eyes to his beautiful partner, laying over him. "Fox, its time to get up for work, I will make the coffee," she says, looking more content than he has ever seen her, not to mention, more rested and full of love for him. Thinking about the events of the night before, he lets the night cross his mine over and over, thinking to himself, what have I done, what if it isn't her that regrets this, what if it is me. Getting out of bed, he grabs his bag and walks into the bathroom, when he hears Scully fumbling around in the kitchen with the coffee maker. After taking a shower and getting dressed for work, he walks into the kitchen to see her in her robe with her coffee at the table, an extra cup waiting for him. Walking past the sofa, he tosses his bag onto the corner of the sofa and continues walking to the table, thinking to himself, "What am I going to say?" Sitting at the table, he picks up his cup and takes a sip, this is the best coffee he has had in a long time. "Good morning Dana, I…uh, what are we going to tell Skinner, I am staring to wonder if we did the right thing here, I mean, we could get into real trouble here, not to mention, you could lose your job and credentials because of me," he says quietly. Looking at him with confusion, "I thought you were worried about me regretting it, I didn't know you were having second thoughts, Fox, if I had known you were having second thoughts, I never would have made love to you, I…don't know what to say, I…" she replies, looking down at her cup of coffee. "Look, I didn't say I regret it, I just said that if we are going to continue with this, we are going to have to get our stories straight, we are going into work in a little while an we need to be prepared in case we are asked any questions, that is all, I just want to cover our butts," he says, looking a little worried. "Your know what Mulder," she says with a sharpness in her voice, "you are right, I do regret it, I am sorry, we shouldn't have made love, we are partners and that is a line that should not have been crossed, so lets just go to work as usual and pretend nothing ever happened," she says, getting up and throwing her coffee cup down into the sink, and walking away. Thinking to himself, "wow, that hurt, she called me Mulder, after calling me Fox all night and this morning, she reverts to Mulder. I didn't mean to upset her, I just don't want anything to happen to her because of me. "Dana, Dana, wait…I just want to tell you that I am sorry, I didn't mean to upset you in any way, I…I love you," he says, walking down the hall in the direction she was headed. "No, Mulder, don't, don't tell me you love me because it isn't going to work, and don't call me Dana, we are partners, not lovers, you call me Scully and I will call you Mulder and we'll will go back to things the way they were, you are right, it was a mistake, and I think you should go on to work, I will be in later, I will see you then, I need some time to think things over," she says, walking away from him. Not wanting to upset her any more than he has already don't, he goes back into the living room, grabs his bag from the sofa and walks out the door, locking and closing it behind him. Walking into the bedroom, she flops onto the bed, with a big sigh, a single tear rolls down her cheek, she knows she doesn't regret it and would do it again if given the chance, she finally lets him in after six years and then he decides that it isn't what he wants, he doesn't want her, he never did, he just charmed her to get her into be, but it wasn't even that so much as it was the fact that she loved him, really loved him and he, in return didn't love her. She picks up the telephone and calls AD Skinner, "Sir, I won't be in today, I am not feeling well, ok, thanks, bye," she says, hanging up the phone.


End file.
